1 post tagged “contradicitions”
Lately, kids, I have been taking stock. Mainly because sometimes when I am sitting across from someone who barely knows me, or thinks they know me, or tells me something about myself that they think they have figured out, I am tempted to reach across the divide, take their hand and say, "Do you know who you are trifling with?" See I have a motherly veneer, a generous spirit and it fools certain fools into thinking they can put me into a category or dismiss my power.
I have earned every scar, every gold star and every reason to sing off-key or laugh too loudly or bare my life for others if I want to. I have seen things. I have been places. I have walked long miles into some harsh winds. You think you know me? Try again.
I have been a cheerleader, a waitress, a protester, an abused woman. I have been a stay-at-home mom and a working mom. I have experienced abortion, miscarriage and the death of a son. I have gotten into the New York Times news room on sheer persistance and Midwestern niceness. I have feared for my life. I have been arrested. I have faced my own arrested development. I have played on the first varsity girls soccer team in the state. I have appeared in an after-school movie. I have raised three sons alone. I have lost my shoe while stinking drunk. I have lost financial security. I have won awards as a journalist. I have been hounded by lawyers and creditors. I have been given hundreds of thousands of dollars from the people who love me most. I have failed and had to try again as a parent. I lived for 18 years with another's mental illness. I have filed a restraining order. I have climbed mountains. I have written books. I have had great love. I have had long years with none. I have believed and I have doubted. I have built things with my own hands. I have broken things out of rage and necessity. I have been a good and trusted friend. I have been robbed. I have stolen. I have been fucked over and well-fucked.
And that's just the short list.
